Blasted Integrity

"We believe in being honest, true, chaste...."

Yes yes, and all that stuff.

I consider myself an honest person.  

I don't cheat on my taxes, I've never stolen my neighbor's newspaper, I don't try and sneak extra items in my Costco cart...heck, I've never even tried to fill up my gas tank and run!

I don't have a problem with the big honesty things, really I don't, but for some reason, every so often, my integrity is tested...just a little bit.

And I don't like it.

It's if Satan is "just checking" to see if I'll still do the right thing. 

 I don't like being checked.

Last week I ordered a few items from Ann Taylor.  Beautiful clearance items that I do oh so love.  I received them in the mail yesterday.  This afternoon, an identical package showed up on my doorstep with a repeat of the same items, same tracking number and same order number.

Blast.

Now, I immediately called Ann Taylor to tell them about the problem (Problem?  Is free clothing a problem?)...because I'm just that honest to call immediately.  (enter gagging noise here)

I was put on hold and had to listen to some really crappy hold music.  You would think that because they sell beautiful clothing Ann Taylor would spring for nicer hold music- they don't.

 I was on hold for a good 15 minutes and these were the options that went through my head as I waited so patiently to be honest. ( I said I was honest, I never said anything about being patient.)

"Ann Taylor doesn't need these clothes back, it was their mistake in the first place."

"My little sister wears this exact same size, she could use them!"  (ok ok, she wears a smaller size than me, but she wouldn't cry over new clothes even if they did drown her scrawny frame)

"If I took them back to the store...they might put the money back in my account and then I could buy more clothes...for my sister of course...no, screw the sister- more clothes for me!

"Maybe they will thank me for my honesty and just GIVE me the clothes"

And while these thoughts were racing in my Evil Jill head,  Nice Jill realized that her mansion in heaven just lost some granite or tile somewhere just for thinking dishonest thoughts and that if she didn't stop her scheming ways she would be living eternally with a dirt floor for sure, that or in a trailer house on the south side of Heaven. 

So really, while still listening to awful hold music, I came to the conclusion that I was just hoping for Ann Taylor client services to give me permission to be dishonest.  

Because if they gave me permission, it wouldn't be bad and then I could keep the clothes and my celestial upgrades.

But they didn't give me permission, they just emailed me a free return label and told me to drop the clothes in the mail. 

 Dang Ann Taylor.

And dang Satan for knowing my weakness of free high quality clothing.

clearing my brain and my camera phone

Just like the pictures taken by my I phone, my brain is very fuzzy; and just like my I phone, my memory is full and needs to be dumped.  

I'm killing two birds with one stone here.

This jewel was taken as I tried to sleep on what is known as the "laying down spot" on our basement couch.  I'm trying to keep in perceptive that I'm loved...especially when I'm trying to rest.  There is no rest for the wicked around our house.  That could actually be the theme for this summer...

"Summer 2011- No Rest for The Wicked"

(I should print up T-shirts.)

No really, summer is half over and I can't believe how busy we have been.  Now trust me, I'm doing the minimal I possibly can, but I still feel like I am running everyday. (figuratively running- I'm not exercising.)

But to document how busy I feel,  here are a few things the Dixon family has been up to written in a vomit like manner...I figure I'll feel better if I just get it up and out all at once:

Andrew is still swimming four times a week, but his lazy parents haven't taken him to one meet.  We bite, I know.  He has also started Gadget Camp and goes to CSI two times a week for a month.  He told me last week that a few of the boys in the class were pretty weird.  Get used to it Andrew, most gadgety people are.

Carter and Colby start their second round of swimming lessons tomorrow.  They love it but I don't love sitting in the heat.  The massive Sonic beverage I'll pick up on the way home will make up for it.    

Steve is still working hard because I'm still spending his money and his children keep feeling the need to eat.

We have travelled to Salt Lake, Boise and Idaho Falls way too many times to count in the last month.

(some of the reasons we have gone I will not even admit to)

At least four batches of homemade ice cream have been made and consumed in the last month.

(how much by me will not be admitted to either)

My garden is producing delicious peas and I will have zucchini coming out of my ears in the next week.  I have promised to fill our freezer with zucchini bread for Steve and Andrew...but without chocolate chips, those things are expensive.  (I've got to pay for my shoe fetish somehow.)

We are all excited for corn, potatoes and carrots.  I am the only one excited for the green beans and tomatoes.

My sister JaNae now lives in Boise and is the main reason I have gone so many times.  I will hopefully be going again this weekend.  The fact that Cheesecake factory and Ann Taylor are also there is just an added bonus.  

Our lawn needs to be mowed.  I apologize to our neighbors.

My friend Megan and I took our 11 and almost 11 year old boys to see the Bodies exhibit this last week in Idaho Falls.  I loved it.  Andrew confessed he thought it was gross.   "Mom, those are real bodies on display and everyone can look at them!"   That was the point Andrew.  So much for educating young minds.  He at least enjoyed the Kiwi Loco in Pocatello on the way home.

Colby asked me the other day if his "tentacles controlled him."   I informed him he didn't have tentacles.  He informed me otherwise by pointing to his "tentacles."  I ended the conversation by stating to my five year old that his BRAIN controls him.   I also told him that an octopus has tentacles, and that what he has are entirely different.  (please...someone kill me.)

Carter is growing up way too fast.  I'm amazed at how much he is changing.  In addition to his sweet tan, the boy's face is thinning out and he is losing his little boy look. Steve even mentioned his arm muscles to me the other night.  He is a lean mean almost second grade machine.  I'm glad that his one front tooth is still waiting to come in.  I think it keeps him looking young to be toothless.

On one of my many Boise trips, my mom and I stopped in at RC Willey.

If...I had all the money in the world, I would  refurnish my  basement family room (among other things).

A much larger flat screen would hang on the wall above this.

My feet would rest on this.

And I would be sitting on this couch.

But I don't have all the money in the world, so this stuff I'm guessing is still at RC Willey.

 My children too dream of different furniture.

This couch was at Costco last week.  The selling point for the boys was THREE laying down spots.

Here they are demonstrating what they would do if I bought this couch.  Sure...you would all lay quietly and never wrestle or jump around on this massive bed of a couch.

This couch is very similar to the couch Steve had in his basement when we were dating.  

Because of personal experience, we are NOT buying this.  Trust me, it would just cause trouble for teenage boys.

The largest Idaho dust devil I have ever seen.

(Random, I know)

Now I am not  one to post naked pictures of my children, but this had to be documented.

Last week Colby broke out in hives from the top of his head down to his ankles.  We have no idea what caused them.  The ones one his back and stomach are not as noticeable because of his tan.  He was miserable itchy and hot.  The only upside to hives?  The Benadryl.  He was sleepy for the next twenty four hours- it was nice break.  (I'm awful)

However,  I pray whatever caused the hives doesn't happen again.  I worry about the next reaction being even worse. 

My Favorite Girl

She is my favorite girl in the whole world.

(Even with the Cheetos face and booger nose.)

Idaho Summer

Sometimes you get lucky and get to see this in your own front yard.

Froot Loops with Marshmallows

Surprisingly, his blood sugar was in the 130s two hours after he ate a whopping bowl of sugar with fruity shaped sugar for breakfast.

(I'm not letting Steve take the kids grocery shopping anymore.)

It may not look like it, but we do take diabetes seriously.

Even Saylor helps out.

(It's sad, but my 19 month old can properly insert a test strip.)

Happy Weekend

Our 4th of July could have been depicted in a Norman Rockwell painting.

It was simple, spent with friends and family, and very fun.

The festivities actually started Friday night after Steve brought home what will now be known as the best $34 ever spent.  It was cheap blow up pool from Kings.

Add a few expensive gallons of city water and we had hours of fun!

Sunday evening this man promised my boys that if they got their chores done early Monday morning, he would take them to Target to blow all their money on Legos.  At 6:10 am Monday morning, Carter woke me up to tell me he was going to clean my toilet.  

When asked why he woke me up so early, Carter retorted that Dad had told him to let him sleep in until 7:00, so he woke me up instead.  Nice.

When I rolled out of bed at 6:30, the toilets had been cleaned, the trees had been watered and our front yard looked like it was being set up for a garage sale.  The boys had cleared out the garage so Steve could sweep it out.  

By 9:00 am, the garden was weeded, the garage had been cleaned and Steve and the boys were on their way to Target.   They brought me home a BIG soda.  

I needed it by then!

The afternoon was spent in the back yard "swimming" in two feet of grassy water.

Saylor mostly sat on the benches and enjoyed cold watermelon.

Andrew worked on his siphoning skills.

Carter...well Carter gave a lot of great looks.

I just like this picture.  Say Say loves her feet.

We invited my parents over for dinner and invited over some friends and more family over to watch fireworks and have kids play in the pool...which turned into a gigantic mud pit by the end of the night.

Dinner included grilled chicken, fresh fruit and an amazing salad made by my mother from spinach and lettuce grown in her garden.  Have I said that I love summer?

Saylor is adored by her grandparents!

The best part of the evening was watching neighbor kids and nieces light things on fire.

I'm impressed no one was burned.

We might be creating pyro's here.

We stayed up until almost midnight setting off firecrackers and watching the illegal fireworks set off by people in surrounding neighborhoods.  Steve purchased one BIG illegal firework entitled the 

"Mother Load."

As I watched it light up the sky above our home, I thought for sure our house was going to burn to the ground.  

Steve is lucky it didn't.

We also celebrated Steve's Dad's birthday.  Mike and Chenele brought over Lazy Daisy cake and ice cream.  It was delicious.

Happy Birthday Gary!  

I honestly hope every Fourth of July can be like this one.  It was picture perfect.

This Past Week

This past week has been a busy one.  There has been so much to document that hasn't been.

But what needs to be written about more than anything else is the passing of my maternal grandmother.

Sarah H. Barzee Acor passed away Friday June 24, 2011.

Her posterity included 13 children, 55 grandchildren, 151 great grandchildren and 5 great great grandchildren.

Grandma Sadie lived a very humble life and was a wonderful example of selflessness.  She had practically nothing because she gave everything she had to people she felt needed it more than her. 

Unfortunately, I did not know her well, but it was not her fault that I didn't live close.

I do however look very much like her.

These pictures were taken when each of us were about 16 and were framed side by side and displayed on her mantel.

Some of my childhood memories of visiting my grandmother's home include:

Grandma Sadie always had hollyhocks growing in her garden.

She had five gallon buckets of ice cream in her freezer.

He graham crackers were always stale. (this makes me laugh)

She had an old set of Lincoln logs in her hall closet to play with.

She painted with oils and had her award ribbons from her paintings hanging in the spare bedroom.

She had a picture of the prophet and all of the apostles from the Ensign conference report center page taped on the closet door in her hallway.

She would serve us raw milk and frozen corn on the cob cooked in the microwave when we came to visit.

She had large hands.

Her bathroom smelled like yellow dial soap.

She was always happy.

Her basement scared me to death and it was known fact that the boogy man lived in her food storage room even though she would deny it.

The north wall of her basement was just Styrofoam insulation.  This wall was covered in marker and fingernail scratched grand kid graffiti.  I'm sure my name could still be found on that wall today.

Grandma was honest to a fault.  I purposely left a pizza recipe at her home to hopefully enlarge her recipe box.  Her idea of pizza included bread, ketchup, cheese and sliced hot dogs.  She returned my recipe card in the mail with a lovely note.

She sent me a card with a one dollar bill in it every year on my birthday.

My brother Jared and I spent the night at her home once.  She took us to the store and bought a huge box of Cookie Crisp for us after we assured her our mother allowed that type of cereal.  The next morning, Jared and I admitted to her that our mother would never buy us sugar cereal.  Grandma told us that we would have to take the cereal back to the store...but she couldn't because we had eaten the entire box before she woke up.

Her piano was slightly off tune and was missing the finish on many of the keys.  I remember her playing "Teach Me to Walk in the Light" as I sat on a chair and stared out her front window.

She had a massive wooden fork and spoon hung on her wall.

She was colorblind- a trait that has been passed on by my mother and by me (we are both carriers of the gene) and has manifested with my very colorblind son Carter.  

Her favorite color was lavender.  We think it was one of the only colors she could truly see.

Grandma was buried in the Iona Idaho Cemetery this last Wednesday.  All nine of her living children were in attendance along with many many of her grandchildren and great grandchildren.  It was a wonderful day as I was able to spend time with members of my mother's family that I do not see but every five years or so.  Her life was honored and celebrated and I was grateful to learn more about her personally through the wonderful tributes that were given at the funeral.

She was loved and will be dearly missed.