Coping with Humor

I'm coping today.  My extended family's world has been turned upside with news that is not my story to share.  We are being brave, especially those who are closest to the situation.  I've been stewing the past few days with the reality that life is brimming with trials that seem unfair and are blatantly unwanted.  But, how we deal with trials is the true test.  What do we learn, how do we grow, how do we carry on in spite of or because of these trials?

At the General YW's broadcast a few weeks ago our prophet President Monson told the young women to "Look to the lighthouse of the Lord."  He talked about three signals that will help us on this earthy journey.  I wrote notes on my phone during his talk and these are what I can glean from my notes this afternoon.  Reading these notes are helping me today.  

The three signals are Believe, Obey and Endure.  

 If you believe- you act.  We are responsible to keep our own testimony.  After we believe (synonymous for accept) we must obey.  Our decisions do determine our destiny.  Every Cinderella has her midnight:  there is a reckoning, and the ledger must be balanced.  Lastly we must endure- we must seek heavenly guidance one day at a time.

I'm good with the believe and obey part.  I'm pretty good and doing what is expected of me.  However, the enduring part can be daunting.  It can seem heavy and cumbersome.  It can feel lonely, heart wrenching, overwhelming, looming, trying and just flat out HARD!  I've had many WHY questions in the last few days.  WHY WHY WHY?  But I'm humbled by the words of the one very closest to this trial- the one personally experiencing this trial- the one who will have to suffer far more than the rest of us- the one who will endure the pain while the rest of us must only watch and feel helpless...unable to change the situation no matter how much we wish, plead and pray we could.   "There must be something I need to learn from this."  

So...I'm going to follow this persons example and be humble.  I'm going to endure to the best of my ability.  I'm going to seek heavenly guidance on a daily basis and pray that my pleadings of comfort, healing and love will help someone I love most dear. 

In the mean time, (total shift of subject coming right now...sarcasm and inappropriateness ahead- be warned.) I'm going to cope with humor.

So...without further ado...here are some things that may have been heard in our household this week.

I wonder if my children are going to make it too adulthood without being totally warped.

Colby at breakfast:  Nobody better sit by me...I'm stinky.

Carter while rubbing his ear (the boy has the god-given talent of making his ear squeak like a mouse on  speed.  Really, its loud and squeaky):  Do you think a video of my ear squeaking could win on AFV?

Carter:  Mom, when are we having pork sandwiches for dinner?  We've got the pork...we've got the buns...we've got the sauce...and we have me to eat it!

Colby:  I'm SO glad I'm growing hairs.  Because, when I'm a dad my stomach will be warm when I'm almost naked.  Seriously, I will have a hairy chest!

Failed Easter Pictures

I've spent a week reading blogs with examples of perfect family Easter pictures.  

I am posting the following just to prove:

1.  We did get dressed up on Easter Sunday.

2. We tried to take pictures.

However, due to every member of my family, these pictures were a complete failure.

 Now...don't let these innocent faces fool you.   They were all little monsters.  MONSTERS!

For example...

This boy looks like a little slice of heaven doesn't he?

Among other problems in this picture, Colby couldn't keep that carrot out of his mouth.

(why did we let them hold the carrot anyway?)

Darling little girl wouldn't you think?

NO...she was a stinker pulling crusty teenager angst faces the entire time!

Does this picture need an explanation?

Don't get it? Let me help you out.

Yeah, my 11 year old is awesome.

Steve couldn't keep his eyes open.

And...neither Steve or I noticed you could practically see up my skirt in almost every pictures with me and the kids.   Plus, I looked drugged an any picture that could be considered modest.  

(neither example is pictured for obvious reasons)

This boy, however, was practically perfect in every shot.  To bad the rest of the Dixon family couldn't glean from his example.  Thanks Carter, you are adorable.  If I had more cash I would give you 5 bucks.

We will try next Easter for perfect family pictures.

(ha ha)

Just for emphasis on bad pictures etiquette.

I asked Saylor to smile and say cheese this afternoon.

This is what she gave me.

I was REALLY lucky to get this.

REALLY LUCKY.

What I Did on a Random Saturday in April

Steve worked this morning, so the kids and I spent our time cleaning.  It's refreshing when all three boys are willing to help with Saturday chores (should be named once a month chores because we haven't had a big cleaning fest in WAY too long.)  Carpets were vacuumed, toilets were scrubbed, furniture was dusted and appliances shined.  The house smelled of comet, pinsol and pledge...my favorites because it smells like clean.  I made a dent in the laundry, fixed simple meals, went through clothes bins for workable hand-me-downs, (blast...all three boys need new shorts): all without yelling profusely at my children.

This afternoon I worked outside digging grass away from our trees, building climbing support for peas, and planting early vegetables.  My face is wind and sunburned, and my body is tired.

Tonight I spent time watching a general YW training meeting to prepare for stake training Thursday night.  I need to study and feel the Spirit more.  It would help with EVERYTHING.  I'm grateful for church resources online.

...still to do:

Fold laundry
Prepare kids clothes for Sunday
Eat candy (maybe lots and lots)
Get in bed before 11pm.  (not likely)

packed my bags and moved to crazy town

How do I put this delicately?

Every 28 days or so...I honestly lose my mind and become a crazy person.  Blame the moon, the rotation of the earth around the sun, my hormonal shifts...or whatever, I honestly morph into a different person that I do not know...or like...or understand.

Mentally:

I no longer have rational thoughts.

I'm more irritable than a mother bear.

I can't stand being in the same room as myself.

Physically:

I gain five or so pounds for no reason.

The majority of my clothes no longer fit. (only the items with copious amount of elastic)

I can sleep for hours without reprieve of exhaustion.

I'm in constant pain.

Socially:

For all the reasons above...I should not be seen socially.

I think my husband today is contemplating packing up the kids and moving away for the next 5-7 days.

I'm contemplating crawling into my closet and disappearing...that or underneath my bed. (But alas, the extra weight around my midsection would inhibit me from fitting either place.)

I fully realize this post is completely inappropriate in every way.  

But when have I ever been appropriate?

Before I type something even more inappropriate, I'm going to drown my sorrows in four ibuprofen and a pint of Ben and Jerry's.  (If I'm going to gain 5 pounds it might as well be for a delicious reason.)

Walker Family Eggcellent Easter

Sunday afternoon the Dixon family ventured to the Walker Compound to enjoy the 

Ardith Walker Annual Easter Egg Hunt Extravaganza!

(Sponsored by Dr. Gary Walker at Eastland Vision Clinic)

We were treated to dinner, fine conversation and an Easter egg hunt to shame all other hunts.

It's a classy affair.

The hunt participants ranged from age 2-12 and were lined up by age (not height, or my kids would have had an unfair advantage) and allowed to enter the hunting grounds youngest to oldest.

(the large jumps in height down represent my vertically challenged children)

Some participants couldn't contain their enthusiasm.

Some could.

Some were just too cool let anyone know how they felt inside either way.

And they were off!

Saylor cheered up slightly as her bag got fuller...

and she realized there was CANDY in her eggs.

It didn't take her long to realize who would open the candy for her.  

Grandmas are the best you know!

Colby did great finding his eggs.

Carter had to take a few breaks to count his.

(Each participant had 25 eggs with their name on each one.  The hunt lasts way longer this way!)

Andrew loves candy and all, but was mostly excited about the eggs concealing poker chips that could be turned in for money.  The boy has financial needs.

(Is it a sin to give kids poker chips on a sacred holiday?)

Did I mention cousins at these events are the best!

Thanks Mom and Dad for having us over for a great evening.  The sugar rush given to my children and the extra cash flow is just an added bonus!

...and what evening at Grandpa's wouldn't be complete without a tractor ride?

we work hard so we can play hard

We must have worked really hard this last month because we played our guts out this weekend!

Our friends the Ward family called us a few weeks ago and told us about a deal to stay in Sun Valley and ski.  It was cheap enough we couldn't pass it up.

We bribed my mom into taking Saylor overnight, packed up the boys Friday afternoon and headed north. 

Sun Valley had an Easter egg hunt at the Village Friday.  There were a few eggs, way too many kids and it was over in honestly 15 seconds.  But...anything with the Wards is worth the effort. 

Our hotel room was at the Lodge and our kids have never stayed anywhere so nice.  They were in heaven with the robes, slippers, chocolates on their pillows and fancy soaps.  (ok...it was me that liked the fancy soap.  I picked that place clean and now have five bars of cute soap for future use.  It never hurts to stock up!)  I think our children might need to get out more.

We let the boys stay up late and watch movies with no regards for bedtimes. 

What kid wouldn't be happy?  I'm loving my kids being old enough to have fun times like this with them- there was minimal complaining and lots of gratitude.  Older kids are really fun!

The rest of the pictures were of us skiing at Baldy on Saturday.  We stayed mostly on lower River Run but made it to the top once with Carter and Colby.  It took us an hour to get down...so we didn't go up again.  Colby isn't quite ready for that kind of skiing.  He'll be there next year.

He was a trooper!

I haven't skied Baldy since my senior year in high school.  I forgot how amazing the view was at the top.  I also forgot how big the mountain was and how weak my muscles are.  It is bad I was grateful for beginner skiers to blame my slowness on?  One day I will get better at this...one day.

Steve and his skiing buddies.

These boys are going to have a lot of fun in the next few years.

Carter wanted to go back to the top with Steve so I stayed on the small run with Colby.  We went a few times and then decided we needed a break at the lodge. Here's my little guy resting in the sunshine.

 I have a new appreciation for my dad and all he did to teach five of us kids how to ski.  My arms and back are sore today after pulling and lifting this little man around on the slushy sticky spring snow.

He is worth it.  

Colby is going to be an awesome skier one day.  I won't be able to watch in fear of his limbs snapping, but he will be a sight to see. 

Colby used my phone to take a picture of me.  He told me to give a scared skiing face.  

This was the best I had at the moment.

By 2pm the snow was slushy and the kids were done.  They make snow castles instead.  

(I have no idea how Steve's ski got into this shot.)

My only picture of Andrew. 

 He sped off with his friend Corban ans was only seen periodically when food or water was needed.  He is getting old way too fast.  Steve and I discussed that it will only be a few short years before this boy is asking to borrow the car to go skiing by himself. 

 Be. Still. My. Heart.

A Little Dental Humor

This is the sign outside Steve's new office site.  I smile every time I read it. 

Steve's dad had it made up over the weekend and put it up on Monday.

The weather was decent yesterday evening so we walked over with the kids to check out the sign and progress at the site. 

(Yes...I said walk.  Steve's new office is less than a mile from our home.  Another thing that makes me smile every time I think about it!)

  Here are a couple pictures of the progress.

The boys got bored with dirt and cement so they ventured over the high school grounds and rolled down the hill a few dozen times.  They were all sick and dizzy by the end of the night.

As a family we will be spending many evenings walking to the new office and playing on the hill this spring and summer.  I'm planning on documenting the office progress regularly.

...just had to share one more GF triumph.  

Gluten Free Waffles.  

I changed a pancake recipe from the Maninis Flour website and made waffles.  There were amazing.   After a few trial runs, I figured out that they needed to be cooked around 400 on my waffle maker.  They were crispy on the outside and creamy in the middle.  They would rival any gluten waffles I have ever made.   Andrew mastered shoving more calories into his mouth in a smaller amount of time with minimal effort exerted by creating the 'waffle sausage sandwich'.  It will now be a gluttonous Dixon tradition.